a million ways to die in the west mustache quotes

One of A Million Ways to Die in the West is to give away all your jokes in the promos leading up to your film's debut. Albert: My worst fear is to OD on a recreational drug. For a few chuckles more. Apple Inc. A Million Ways to Die in the West is a 2014 American western comedy film directed by Seth MacFarlane, who wrote the screenplay with Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild. Directed by Seth MacFarlane. Anna: Oh God, that was never gonna work out anyway. After Seth MacFarlane's directorial debut Ted became one of the highest-grossing comedies ever made, he pretty much had the freedom to do whatever he wanted for his second movie. Anna and Albert. Seth MacFarlane, Amanda Seyfried, Charlize Theron. Albert: Okay, that's Bridget, all right? Do you know what kind of hours he has to work? I never see him. McNeely bases his playful and robust score on classic silver screen-era Westerns, offering up a pastiche that's both reverent and self-aware, while the theme song, which is performed by Alan Jackson, and "If You've Only Got a Mustache," the latter of which is performed by Grammy-nominated American tenor Amick Byram, are as goofy as they are . Maybe its his way of paying her back for mentioning her in his tasteless We Saw Your Boobs song at the Oscars. Edward: Man, I see kids everywhere with those stock hoops lately. No better way to make your ex-girlfriend want you back more than to let her see you with another girl. Updated at 22nd July 2015 by rearranging the order of some entries: What is the Japanese language plot outline for A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)? Then the mysterious Anna rides into town and captures Albert's interest and heart, but with her deadly husband in town, Albert is going to have to become the western gun-slinging hero he never was. All rights reserved. It stunts their attention span. If You've Only Got a Moustache. At a recent press conference held in Los . The American West, 1880s. Is it possible to overthink moronic humour? Albert: Yeah. The movies best lines are typically one-liners that rarely come from the lips of MacFarlane, who frequently oversells a joke when he isnt merely spouting obscenities. She has a problem with retardation, but she's full of love. Louise: [flustered] They're not that big. Amick Byram. MacFARLANE: It always depends on the gag, more than the person. Copyright 2023 And then, for a good reason, Albert gets dumped by his charming girlfriend, Louise, only to fall head over heels in love with the intriguingly mysterious, horse-riding and pistol-packing stranger, Anna. Louise: You're not even a good sheep farmer, Albert. Stream songs including "A Million Ways To Die", "Main Title" and more. Starring Seth MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Liam Neeson, Neil Patrick Harris, Amanda Seyfried, Sarah Silverman and Giovanni Ribisi. This version also has even more footage in deleted scenes, and an alternate beginning and ending. Copyright 2023 Albert: I'm not the hero. Albert is befriended by Anna, along with her "brother" Lewis who are new to Old Stump, and she who is self-admittedly "smokin' hot". When a mysterious and beautiful woman rides into town, she helps him find his courage and they begin to fall in love. A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Great Scott. But when her husband, a notorious outlaw, arrives seeking revenge, the farmer must put his newfound courage to the test. He gets no comfort or love from his girlfriend Louise (Amanda Seyfried), who breaks his heart by dumping him for moustachioed playboy Foy (the reliably funny Neil Patrick Harris). All What should be an ensemble comedy is more of a showcase for MacFarlane, who also co-writes and takes production and music credits. When a sheep herder who hates the West saves a young lady . All rights reserved. After Albert backs out of a gunfight, his fickle girlfriend leaves him for another man. The men who were courageous and resilient were the men who prospered. I'm the guy in the crowd making fun of the hero's shirt; that's who I am. 3 likes. R. with updates on movies, TV shows, Rotten Tomatoes podcast and more. Constantly terrified, the meek and lily-livered sheep farmer, Albert Stark, mainly struggles to stay out of trouble in dusty and dangerous 1880s Arizona, utterly convinced that everything out there can and will kill him. Newspapers Limited, 8 Spadina Avenue, 10th Floor, Toronto, ON M5V 0S8. As a cowardly farmer begins to fall for the mysterious new woman in town, he must put his newly found courage to the test when her husband, a notorious gun-slinger, announces his arrival. These are full loads. Albert: She moved to town a couple of years ago to take over the schoolmarm job. Its justits a song about sperm, and yet they treat it with such legitimacy in their orchestration and their vocal performance and their choreography, and its this huge number with what looks to be over 100 dancers on screen. What are the differences between the Theatrical Version and the Extended Cut. Like, My God, you put all this work and all this time and all this artistry into a song about sperm?'. "There it is!" "Dear God, look at it!" "It's beautiful!". 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Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story: Season 1, Link to Marvel Movies Ranked Worst to Best by Tomatometer, Link to Asian-American Pacific Islander Heritage, Link to RT25: Celebrating 25 Years of Rotten Tomatoes. Albert is befriended by Anna, along with her "brother" Lewis who are new to Old Stump, and she who is self-admittedly "smokin' hot". Old Stump Bluegrass. A Million Ways to Die in the West. We follow the life of Albert Stark (Seth MacFarlane), an incompetent and inept sheep farmer whose girlfriend Louise (Amanda Seyfried) breaks up with him because of his glaring lack of courage and skill. And, you know, the funny thing is, you don't even have to get bitten. Edward: Yeah. Albert: I know. "A Million Ways to Die in the West" lacks the inspired lunacy of Mel Brooks' timeless Western, and won't last the ages as a seminal swipe at the genre, but at least MacFarlane gives the . You can't blame Seth MacFarlane, that one-man comedy . Copyright Fandango. 1882. Anna: Especially a smoking hot girl. Seth MacFarlane, Seth MacFarlane's A Million Ways to Die in the West: A Novel. Entertainment Weekly may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. What Shows Have Been Renewed or Canceled. Basically, if it's not you, it wants to kill you, and just might succeed. Although she states otherwise, the shoot-out is arguably the last straw for Louise, Albert's vain girlfriend, who breaks up with him. Narrator: Some people are born into the wrong time and place. Set in 1882 in the American west, Albert is a lowly farmer with a nice girlfriend. I read an article in the paper. [leaves]. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Listen to A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) [Deluxe Edition] by Joel McNeely on Apple Music. . But when she leaves him for the more successful and handsome owner of a moustachery store, Albert returns to his lonely daily life of trying to avoid death. 15. I went to your farm the other day, and I saw one in the back yard, three way up on the ridge, two in the pond and one on the roof. Albert recklessly challenges Foy to a gunfight a week hence, even though the hapless sheep minder literally cant shoot to save his life. A Million Ways to Die in the West. There was a sheep in the whorehouse the last week. However, when the infamous West outlaw Clinch Leatherwood (Liam Neeson) arrives in town, Albert realizes that he has just intruded on Clinch and Anna's husband-and-wife relationship, and Clinch is hungry for retribution. As Albert and Anna start to fall for each other in the process, Anna has to decide if and when she will tell him the truth: that she is already married, albeit unhappily, to Clinch Leatherwood, a vicious outlaw who, along with his gang, she and Lewis are waiting for in Old Stump. Tinker Bell and the Legend of the NeverBeast, Psycho (The Complete Original Motion Picture Score), A Million Ways To Die In the West (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) [Deluxe Edition], Classic Soundtracks: Psycho (1960 Film Score), The Imitation Game (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), The Magnificent Seven (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), Hercules (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack), Cosmos: A SpaceTime Odyssey (Music from the Original TV Series), Vol. Amick Byram. [Albert notices a glow from inside a building and peeks inside], [It is Doc Brown from "Back to the Future" working on the DeLorean, which is under a tarp; Doc notices Albert and covers up the car]. The film received mixed reviews from critics, with criticism directed toward the film's length and MacFarlane's performance. Edward: Albert, he's dead. A Million Ways to Die in the West is a 2014 American Western black comedy film directed by Seth MacFarlane and written by MacFarlane, Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild.The film features an ensemble cast including MacFarlane, Charlize Theron, Amanda Seyfried, Neil Patrick Harris, Giovanni Ribisi, Sarah Silverman, and Liam Neeson.The film follows a cowardly frontiersman who gains courage with the . I look like I have Parkinson's next to him. 1:31. Albert: Oh. There's, uh, famine, disease, gunfights And, uh, wild animals. Then Stark must put his newfound bravery to the test when Anna's outlaw husband arrives with plans to plant him in an unmarked grave. Cochise: There is an ancient proverb among my people: Sometimes the only way for a man to find true happiness is to take drugs in a group. After Albert backs out of a gunfight, his fickle girlfriend leaves him for another man. Privacy Policy And in director/co-writer/star Seth MacFarlane's A Million Ways to Die in the West (in theaters today), Neil Patrick Harris, playing the douchebag proprietor of an Old West mustache shop, loses a . A Million Ways to Die in the West: Trailer 1, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Ways to Die, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Eddie's Girl, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Things Could Be a Lot Worse, A Million Ways to Die in the West: Official Clip - Eddie's First Time. Copyright 2023 Like. 17+. If You've Only Got a Moustache. It won't be easy because there are a million ways to die in the west. There is an unrated, Extended Cut available, approximately 20 minutes longer. Isn't the fair on Saturday? Anyone can read Conversations, but to contribute, you should be a registered Torstar account holder. 2014 Universal Studios. 14. A Million Ways to Die in the West, Seth MacFarlane's follow-up to Ted, has a solid cast and holds promise, but the trailers simply gave all the best jokes away. Entertainment Weekly is a registered trademark of Meredith Corporation All Rights Reserved. Anna: Yeah, well, I'll go with you. Overly crude jokes and gross-out humor drag comedy down. Seth MacFarlane directs, produces, co-writes and plays the role of the cowardly sheep farmer Albert in A Million Ways to Die in the West. All Rights Reserved. Constantly terrified, the meek and lily-livered sheep farmer, Albert Stark, mainly struggles to stay out of trouble in dusty and dangerous 1880s Arizona, utterly convinced that everything out there can and will kill him. [Stark comes running around the corner and falls and his face]. Doctors! All rights reserved. It won't be easy because there are a million ways to die in the west.

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a million ways to die in the west mustache quotes